Why Robin and I Have Been Absent So Long

I just looked and realized we have not posted anything on our blog since September, and only four times in the last year. I’m not sure any of our followers even remember us at this point, but I want anyone out there who still has an interest to know what’s happening.

Robin moved to Florida in June 2016. It’s been almost two years since she moved! Time certainly does fly. Robin is working on a series of blog posts that will update our readers in terms of what has happened for her during the past two years, and how she is currently doing. Those will be coming soon. They are currently being delayed by technological issues. I hate that!

Why have the updates we keep promising not happened earlier? Well, Robin has been caught up in her new life, and I have been caught up in some significant life changes of my own. I want to explain what I’ve been up to and a plan I have for going forward. It does relate to the book, and to some ideas I have about shifting the focus of this blog.

Those who read our story know that a major component of what helped Robin evolve from a place of despair to a place of stability and contentment, was that we actively worked together to shift her world view. In other words, I made a conscious decision to do what most psychotherapists do not typically do. I introduced Robin to a new spiritual belief system, with the hope that she might adopt it.

This is not typically done in therapy because we are taught to respect our clients’ beliefs and not to impose our own beliefs onto them. But, as I said in the book, desperate times with Robin called for desperate measures. Shifting her world view became a significant focus of treatment. And, Robin and I remain convinced that this was a major factor in terms of her being able to achieve and maintain stability, and to remain mostly content despite her severe mental illness.

I did not emphasize my own spiritual journey in the book, because it was Robin’s story. But there were so many profound ways in which witnessing Robin’s painful meltdown and recovery impacted me on a deep level. I truly believe it brought my spiritual development to a whole new level and changed me permanently and positively.

As I have said, I felt compelled to write the book for years. I believe this was driven by my spiritual guidance. I had no idea why we needed to write the book, I just knew it needed to be written. I didn’t know what to expect once it was actually done. There is no doubt that writing the book and being so completely open with all her friends and family has been a healing experience for Robin. But, I can’t believe we put all that effort into writing it just for that reason. I still believe it is supposed to reach a bigger audience.

How did promoting the book go? It was a miserable failure. I paid several different companies to blast it all over the internet. They did. It led to very few sales. I am not a sales person. Robin certainly isn’t either. And, I was not prepared to spend thousands of dollars to pay a professional promoter. I thought about trying to get a publisher, but eventually I got clear about what needs to happen with the book.

This leads me back to my new life path. During the last year I have been actively working on stepping up my spiritual evolution, which has led to a plan for some significant life changes. I am working on putting together a workshop for psychotherapists on how to integrate spirituality and psychotherapy. Robin’s story will be part of that workshop, and hopefully some of the workshop participants will be interested in buying and reading the book. (The plan is still for all profits from the book to go to Robin, by the way).

I am currently working on coursework to become a Certified Spiritual Counselor. And, in April I will start an intensive on-line class with a psychologist who is also a Spiritual Life Coach. This class is a prerequisite to her Life Coach training program, and requires people to do their own intensive, internal, spiritual work. We never stop evolving, and I am looking forward to digging deeper than ever before and continuing my own spiritual process.

There are some specific differences between psychotherapy and coaching. Unlike psychotherapy which focuses on helping people heal wounds, recover from painful experiences, manage mental illnesses or deal with stressful life circumstances, coaching focuses on helping people achieve their specific life goals. When spirituality is the focus, a life coach helps people navigate their own spiritual evolution which then translates to positive changes taking place in their lives. Coaches do not bill insurance companies, which makes life dramatically easier. No worrying about being an approved provider, getting precertification, or having to bill a reduced rate dictated by the insurance company. I can set my own fees.

Most importantly, however, coaching can happen over the phone. So, it will expand my reach from just South Bend, IN (where there is definitely not a big enough market for spiritual life coaches), to the entire world. This opens up so many exciting possibilities!

At this point in my career I am ready to make this transition. I’ve spent the last five years working in nursing homes, which has been a great job for me during this stage of my life. I find myself talking about spirituality with people almost daily. But, it’s a sad environment. Need I say more? It is time for a change.

So, in the near future, I will be making some changes to this blog in preparation for all of my plans. And, I will be telling the story of my spiritual evolution, for anyone who might be interested.

Thanks to all who have bought and read our book. There are some of you out there. We are so grateful!

 

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About Sharon DeVinney, Ph.D.

Sharon DeVinney, Ph.D. completed her doctoral degree in clinical psychology at Purdue University. She spent ten years doing full-time clinical practice at a community mental health center with primarily adults. She then spent eight years working as an administrator at that same community mental health center while continuing to maintain a small caseload of therapy clients. She now provides clinical services in long-term care facilities in addition to writing, consulting and spending as much time as possible with the people she loves.
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13 Responses to Why Robin and I Have Been Absent So Long

  1. womanoffaith says:

    Your story is amazing! Thank you for the update.

  2. Dawn D says:

    I am sorry I am not one of those people. My own life journey took me to places where life kept happening to me rather than me feeling in charge. I’m working to change this.

    I am so happy for you about the life change. I hope it exceeds all your expectations.

    I am just back from a two day retreat where I was able to work with a life coach. Her insight was so helpful! I could feel my wings appear and unfold.

    Sorry about the book not having reached as wide a success as you were hoping for. There is still time. I do believe, like you, that sometimes, a little guidance, when the person is open to it, or actively seeking it, is rather a good thing. Maybe your work and sharing it will help revolutionise psychotherapy? 🙂

    • Oh Dawn, you are so great! Revolutionizing psychotherapy? Haha. My spiritual mentors would love the way you think…I’m supposed to be dreaming big. The reality is, I’d be thrilled just to make a living as a coach and sell some books. I have more books to write. Mostly I’m just trusting my guidance and going with the flow at this point. (I’ve had plenty of years of life happening to me. I’m trying to balance taking charge and surrendering to the Universe. A daily challenge). Anyway, we appreciate your ongoing support. I’ve been following your blog. Looking forward to hearing about how things evolve! 🙂

      • Dawn D says:

        🙂
        Ha! How things are going? I’m not sure. I just went into a big fight with the ex about him wanting to disrupt our kids’ lives during the week just because his mom wants to see her grands. Well, she can very well come on the weekends they’re at his.
        The kids (at least one of them) doesn’t want to go to their dad’s during the school week. And doesn’t dare say it. It’s enough for me to say no. But he’s threatening me with a judge. So I threatened him with implementing our current custody plan more strictly if I don’t get my kids back when I said they should be. Haven’t heard back. Maybe he went directly to the kids? We’ll see.
        Sigh!

        I think you’re right about going with the flow. At times, it’s just what’s needed.
        XO

      • Yes, I’m so sorry your ex has been so difficult. It’s so hard when you have to keep interacting with someone who is so toxic, especially when your children are being affected by that toxicity. Stay strong! ❤️

      • Dawn D says:

        I’m getting stronger by the day. And so are my kids. Tonight, he expressed the fact he was going to withdraw pocket money from them. They later told me “I guess I won’t be able to buy him any Christmas present since I don’t have any pocket money!” My child is starting to see that their dad is toxic and learning to stand up for themselves. I’m a proud mama, even if a sad one!
        XO

      • Good for all of you! Your kids will figure it all out. Just a matter of time…

      • Dawn D says:

        Yes, I just have to learn to be patient I guess! 😉

  3. Rayne says:

    It’s lovely to hear from you again. I bought your book a while ago already, but haven’t finished it just yet. I need to get back into it. I wish you all the best. 🙂

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